


Kokichi Ouma needs someone

by kokichism



Series: Oumota going through stuff. [3]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Repressed, FML, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I always call him Ouma, I love oumota and I will sink down with this ship, I'm sorry it's so sad, Is it Oma or Ouma I'm confused, Kirumi Tojo Mention, M/M, Momota Kaito loves Kokichi, Not so romantic more like fluff, Oma Kokichi Needs a Hug, Oumota, Sad, Sad Oma Kokichi, Saihara Shuichi Mentioned briefly, Spoilers!!, Takes place after Chapter 4, They both need a Hug, danganronpa - Freeform, spoilers?, why did I write this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-20 05:28:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22076914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kokichism/pseuds/kokichism
Summary: “You are alone Kokichi, and you always will be.”Kokichi believed that. But he never expected a certain someone would continue to be by his side.In other words:Kokichi is extremely sad, and Kaito tries to comfort him?WARNINGS: Heavy angst, mentions of mental breakdowns / panic attacks so if those trigger you please beware, bonding! F E E L S.
Relationships: Momota Kaito/Oma Kokichi
Series: Oumota going through stuff. [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1614499
Comments: 11
Kudos: 205
Collections: Faye’s Favourites





	Kokichi Ouma needs someone

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this is mainly Kokichi being a sad boi, I didn’t intent to publish this at first, I just wanted to write it because I’m listening to this song and it’s so…beautiful it inspired me to write something sad. It’s super angsty… ~In case you’re wondering about the song, it’s from Dusk Maiden of Amnesia, “Requiem”. I always shiver and wanna cry whenever I listen to it. I also don't see much oumota so yay, my babies being sad.

“You are alone Kokichi, and you always will be.” 

He knew…he always knew but he still tried to protect them…all of them! He bit his thumb as he sat down, he had curled up in a small corner of his room and he tried to think but his mind was going blank. Thinking is getting harder. He can’t seem to get the images of every death out of his mind, especially Gonta’s. His face just appeared everytime he closed his eyes, but he tried to shove it at the back of his mind. He squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to calm his heart down. He was sure his only companion would be disappointed as well at him. He knew he would be hated now by everyone…

Shuichi was his…almost friend too -?- . He had fun playing games with him, confusing him with filthy lies. The gremlin couldn’t help it, that was his defense mechanism so no one gets too close. He knew he dug his own grave when he acted as if he is enjoying the game and when he tried to make everyone think he is the mastermind. No one approached him, and if they did, they glared at him or threw insults his way. He wanted out, he wanted to see his family. They were.…aren’t waiting for him…

“Ugh!” his fist collided with the floor. “-fucking bitch!” he hissed as his hand went numb for a few seconds. He knew he had to keep up with his act a little longer…the mastermind would….his plan would work... 

He felt tears well up in his eyes but he just smiled. He saw the blood on his knuckles but didn’t care. The fresh bandage still there from his knife game with the person that piqued his interest, Shuichi Saihara. The most…trustworthy(?) person in this entire game.  
Letting out a small shaky breath he rubbed his watery eyes and tried to calm down, but couldn’t. He felt as if the room was ice cold… he desperately needed someone. Someone to hold onto, someone to talk to but he had no one. He was alone and Shuichi was right. He will forever be alone because his family probably died because of him. DICE…

“Fuck!!” he yelled to particularly no one. He wanted to get up but his legs felt like jelly, along with his arms so he just sat there staring at nothingness, his mind going blank for a few solid seconds. He just needed to calm down… He couldn’t. He started shaking and he wrapped his arms around himself, the feeling unfamiliar and painful to his whole body. His stomach swirled in circles and he felt like throwing up, a headache forming and forcing him to close his eyes tightly. His breath was getting erratic as he squirmed trying to warm himself up, already he wrapped his arms around his knees trying to curl up, as if that would make him disappear.  
‘I bet that is what they would want as well…no one wants me…I thought he would see through my lies but I just had to fuck everything up didn’t I. I should have let Miu kill me…’ he thought but another, far away part of him screamed ‘Then you wouldn’t be able to trap the mastermind! Focus Kokichi!!! F O C U S’. 

He tried to hear the voice of reason, but his heart was aching really badly that made him clutch his shirt wanting to take it off, the weight being too much on him. All those eyes full of hate and anger directed at him made him hug himself even more and quickly took off his shirt trying to breath, but he was starting to lose count and his breathing got even faster.

“N-No!” he exclaimed and shook his head so fast he felt dizzy as black spots appeared. When was the last time he ate? slept? rested like a normal person? He couldn’t even remember… Why did he have to go through this!? Why did he decide to take the role of the villain in the first place!? He didn’t want this! He shouldn’t have directed everyone like this…now he can’t even rely on anyone, after his stupid antics!

‘But then everyone would be lost!’ he bit his lip hard enough to draw blood. ‘They would fall into despair and kill without thinking…’ his mind was making him sick with thoughts. The killing is still happening…he can’t stop it, he can’t stop it, he can’t- a knock on the door made him freeze his mind stopped for a few seconds. Silence for a bit. Quiet…

“…Kokichi?” a soft voice was heard from the other side. Of course… “Can you please open the door?” the voice said in a low tone. “I know you’re in there…you always lock yourself up in your room” the voice added after a bit of silence. The boy stayed frozen in the spot…how could he forget? How dare he forget his most important person in here? He is an eyesore…

“…Kokichi please answer me…why did you act like this during the trial? Everyone will hate you even more…” the other person outside the door said sadly. “Why don’t you try showing your true self? Maybe only to me…please…” the tone turned pleading. ‘No…no no no’ he would never, until he gave his last breath he would never show everyone who he truly is. 

The purple boy bit the inside of his cheek as his fists tightened the fabric underneath them. his pants getting wrinkly and bloody.  
“…I…” he choked and stopped himself, trying to catch his breath. He didn’t want to look weak, not to the most important person for him in there. He didn’t want to seem weak. Not in front of him.. “leave…”

“Kokichi! Thank god you answered, I was getting worried. I know how you get after each trial so I came to check on you, so could you please open your door?” the voice sounded relieved. Why was he? Kokichi doesn’t deserve to be alive…he caused two unnecessary deaths…he should have died…his mind started to wander away again while he was trembling again. The knocking now turned erratic. “Kokichi open the damn door!”  
God damn him and his good will. Kokichi cleared his throat and swallowed hard.  
“You’re such a pain in the ass, you know that. Just leave me alone…” the boy said after he was able to compose a proper sentence. A feeble attempt to shoo the other person away.

“Do you want everyone to see me knocking down your door?! Alright then!-“  
“O-Okay! I’m coming just…don’t come in until I tell you so.” the boy, not trusting his legs, crawled over and unlocked the door before going back to his corner. He always had a breakdown after each trial. Each death ate him from the inside, he wasn’t able to sleep for at least a day and whenever he closed his eyes, looks full of desperation and panic went through his mind.

“Did you unlock the door, ‘Kichi?” the voice said in a smaller tone. The boy only nodded and then remembered that the other person couldn’t see him.  
“Y-Yes…” he curled up again on the floor. He closed his eyes, flashbacks made him furrow his brows but he took deep breaths trying to calm down. The other person stayed quiet and waited patiently for Kokichi to give him the okay. He was too kind… “Come in…” he whispered barely audible but it seems he was heard by the door opening and a tall boy with a purple coat slipped inside the room closing the door behind him quietly. Warm lilac eyes landed on the trembling boy with concern as he sat down next to him at first not saying anything.

“I know I have to act as if I hate you, but I really can’t…continue this Kichi. Please…” his only companion begged almost. Kaito Momota was always by his side, without anyone noticing after the second trial ended and he accidentally found Kokichi having a mental breakdown where cameras weren’t there. He always acted angry and loud when it came to Kokichi in front of their….well his friends. Maki hated the purple haired boy with a passion. At least Shuichi tried to understand him at some point seeing them hang out but after the trial today it seems even Shuichi hates him. His acting was on point because sometimes he didn’t even act. Kokichi knew how to press the right buttons to fire him up, sometimes he liked that about the other boy but sometimes he hated it.

He also hated seeing Kokichi having to take the role of the villain. He knew he was too loud-mouthed and sometimes acted on impulse so he tried to not interact with Kokichi unless it was necessary. He tried to avoid the short boy for his sake mainly so he won’t have to hurt him with his words or even…fists, like that time. Kokichi is so small and fragile…maybe the perfect victim along with Himiko, so Kaito had the urge to protect him.

He really wanted to protect the boy, he’s been through enough, especially after Miu tried to kill him. He knew Kokichi’s words were true in the trial, when he requested to be executed instead of Gonta. And his tears were real as well... He might not completely understand the other boy, hell maybe almost not at all, but his mental strength was admirable. Saying those awful things, maintaining a façade, all day, everyday…death after death…it even made Kaito feel mentally tired. He doubts he would survive all that pressure if he was in Kokichi’s shoes.

“H-Ha- you fell for my lies again. Momo-chan. I’m okay! I’m…okay…” the boy was hyperventilating, of course he wasn’t okay. Kaito said nothing and breathed out before moving his hand ontop of the purple mop of hair. He patted his head, knowing that calms the boy down, but keeping his distance. He has been near the boy during panic attacks, helping him calm down, sometimes staying away from him, giving him space and time to breath and collect himself. He was there when Kokichi cried especially for Kirumi…she was like a mother figure for most, but Kokichi held a soft spot for her, but she went and killed Ryoma. It was devasting for Kokichi, so bad that he wasn’t able to calm down and get in his room in time so he sat behind some bushes in a remoted place and had a mental breakdown. It was nighttime, so Kaito had went out to observe the sky knowing it would calm him down and heard him. 

That’s how they ended up comforting each other most of the time after the deaths of their friends, and loved ones.  
“…What are you doing here, Momo-chan? I thought you would also hate me…after what I said at the trial.” the shortest of the two said avoiding the others’ gaze. He didn’t have the courage to move at all, much less move away from that hand on his head. Deep down, he didn’t want to but he knew he should.  
“What do you mean? It’s like a ritual isn’t it? Everytime a class trial ends I come here…” the ultimate astronaut said and tried to smile, even after the deaths of two of their friends they had to keep moving forward.  
“Yeah but…if someone even sees you near me they would assume we are friends…”  
“Aren’t we?”

“…” the small boy stayed quiet and hid his face between his knees. He didn’t want to talk, and Kaito immediately understood, not pressing the matter. He wanted to be there for Kokichi…he was the person he loved, after all. He clicked his tongue in an almost annoyed tone, who would have thought that Kaito Momota, luminary of the stars, would fall for the small liar? The one who was hated by everyone, while Kaito was loved by everyone. Two people, completely the opposite of each other had feelings for each other.  
They both knew…they were aware of the other, and how the other felt but they never really acted on their feelings, knowing that it would only hurt in the end.  
‘What if he dies next…’ was one of the many thoughts ‘what if I can’t protect him…’ ‘what if he ends up killing someone?’. All those thoughts were swimming around their minds so they never did anything.

But now Kokichi knew he would be next…after his little stunt they both knew he was next, so they stayed silent dwelling on that fact.  
“...” Kaito tried to hold back his own sorrow and sadness as he bit his lip and continued patting Kokichi’s head, before pulling him close, unable to help it, his bangs covering his eyes. He didn’t want to be sad…he wanted to keep a smile on, for his Kichi. He wanted to be cheerful so Kokichi can smile again… but he couldn’t.  
Dark aura surrounded them as Kokichi didn’t move away and just leaned against the touch, feeling calmer now. He dreaded what had to come next. He knew he had to stop the killing game and he knew that the next person to die would be him. He tried not to think about it but he couldn’t just…ignore it. His life would come to an end.

“I’m sorry…” he whispered and hid his face in Kaito’s chest. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry I…don’t want to push you away, please don’t let me push you away anymore.” he whispered again, his voice hoarse and barely audible. All the playfulness and taunting tone was gone, this lively liar had become an almost empty shell.  
“Shh…it’s alirght…” the taller male wrapped his arms tighter around the other and held him closer and protectively. He didn’t care about his uniform getting wet so he just held his friend in his arms. 

“I…love Momo-chan…” the small liar’s muffled voice was heard and Kaito swore he saw stars. It was almost time.  
“I love you too, Kichi. Remember that, no matter what, alright? I…love you…” he said in a soothing tone, burying his face into the other’s hair. He could see the blood from the other’s knuckles staining his own shirt, since Kokichi was basically clinging to him.

“I want to leave this place with you…” Kokichi continued and breathed out closing his eyes. He has calmed down but he opened his eyes again. “I can’t…keep living like this.” he murmured tiredly. “I want this to end…I really want to end this…” he said in a desperate tone and looked up at Kaito who stared back intently. They leaned in, their lips touching, making both boys have tears run down from their eyes. They were clinging to each other, and holding each other, and kissing each other. They didn’t want to stop, who knows what could happen the next few hours? Maybe someone could come in and kill them.  
“I don’t want this anymore…” Kokichi whimpered against Kaito’s lips who just kept him quiet with another kiss, caressing his cheeks and wiping the tears, the smaller boy doing the same, and wiping Kaito’s tears. 

“I-…I don’t want to lose you Kichi… I know we can get out of here together, okay? It’s a promise…” the ultimate astronaut said and smiled moving slightly away as he caressed his beloved’s head.

“Yes…a promise…” the other agreed, but they both knew this promise would be broken in a few days…they knew but they just wanted to live in a lie for just a bit longer…

**Author's Note:**

> Oh boy, I hope you liked it. I tried to not get drowned in feels but I couldn't help it. Angst makes me wanna write even more, and deepen the feelings until there is no return! Any kind of critisism is acceptable! I haven't proof-read this, big oof. I'm still unsure of how to write here(I lowkey have no idea how to make letters bold. italic etc rip, that's sad)  
> I just started writing after a big break of 3 years, writers block sucks honestly, so I'm a bit rusty but I'm trying my best!  
> I have never written with these two characters before so it was interesting and I'm sorry if they are a bit OOC but I tried to portray them to the best of my ability, I love Kokichi and I would love to write more of him, maybe in chaptered fics? I'm still unsure though.
> 
> Thank you if you leave kudos and comments I greatly appreciate it!!


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